What I’m Watching Today: Hi Honey, I’m Home

Today, I came across a pilot called Hi Honey, I’m home that aired on Nickelodeon in 1991. I’ve been watching a lot of unsold pilots lately, and I was genuinely surprised that I liked this one.

By the way, that younger son is A.J. McLean of Backstreet Boys fame

It’s not perfect, but it’s an interesting concept and I am interested in seeing more. I’m seeing on Wikipedia that there was a first season of this show produced, but thus far I can’t find the episodes anywhere. Please let me know if you’ve ever come across them.

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Some Happy YouTube Videos to Get You Through

I’m someone who has struggled with depression for a long time, so for the last couple years, I’ve kept a playlist on YouTube called “Make Me Happy,” so if I ever need a laugh, or a reminder that the world can be a good place, I can go watch my playlist.

I have a feeling some of you are going to need to be cheered up today, so I thought I’d share some stupid internet videos that get me through the tough times.

Deep breaths, folks. It’s all going to be okay.

I saw this video years ago, when I was still in high school and it’s just always stuck with me. It’s a really fantastic little animation, made by artist Dimitri Frazao as his senior film at CalArts.

This video will allow you to feel joy again, however faint the feeling might be right now.

This fish has perfect comedic timing.

Look at this giggling newscaster! One day, you will laugh again!

Go, Pablo, Go!

 

What I’m Watching Today: Pagan Invasion, Vol. 1

From the height of Satanic Panic comes this video guide for parents on the dangers of Halloween. Even though this video is 20+ years old, you can still buy a boxset of all 13 videos.

Highlights: 

  • Did you know that the public school system is the biggest propagator of Halloween? Damn public schools, ruining our children!
  • The top selling genres of film are pornography and horror–proof that our society is going to hell in a hand basket!
  • To ensure the accuracy of horror movies, producers hire practicing witches or satanists as advisers  (Seriously, @7:54)
  • Filmmakers are always trying to convince us that the gentle psyches of American youth cannot be damaged by these gruesome horror films, but in reality copycat crimes from horror movies happen ALL THE TIME
  • A person who grew up with satanist parents and grandparents is interviewed. I wonder if his memories came out while under hypnosis.
  • Crimes involving the occult are reaching epidemic proportions! (says man from 1992)
  • Witchcraft CANNOT be divorced from demonology. Thereby all practicing Wicca or Pagans are evil.
  • There are now (probably) as many practicing witches as there are Christians in England!
  • Roger is a Witch/Martial Arts Expert

witchandmartialartsI wanna know what Roger has a degree in.

  • Satanic ritual abuse is “The Crime of the 90s!”
  • Oh, Jesus Christ! They show mutilated animal bodies! Watch out for that. I didn’t see it coming.
  • One ex-Satanist says that once you do animal sacrifice you just crave more. It’s like cocaine that way.
  • This video has the best green-screened backgrounds

Wow! I wonder what Gothic castle they filmed at?!

  • 87% of 9-year-olds have expressed a desire to kill someone (????) — How do you even gather that kind of data?!

 

Why are Irish McDonald’s Ads so Weird?

This was posted LAST YEAR. Even if it had been posted in like 2009-2010, I would be more understanding, but c’mon. Everyone knows the friendzone is a shitty MRA myth. WTF?

Obviously, these ads are aimed at teen boys. It’s so weird how marketing differs from country to country, right?

It’s really interesting to see how other countries play with their own stereotypes.

Also, why does McDonald’s always look a little better in Europe?

My Favorite Pieces of Barbie History

I have a weird relationship with Barbie dolls.

First of all, I played with them until I was probably like 12, so a little bit beyond when other kids stopped. I built a Barbie Hogwarts in my bedroom, used a cigar box as Harry Potter’s trunk.

Then in college I studied Sociology and Women’s and Gender studies, and spent a semester collecting people’s stories of how they played with Barbie dolls, which I then turned into a paper and then a zine.

Later, I took an experimental video class where I edited pieces of various Barbie advertisements and other symbolically feminine footage (I’m afraid to even look back at the video I made, as I’m sure it was pretty cringe-y and heavy-handed) with a video released to news organizations in 1993 by The Barbie Liberation Organization

The BLO was brought about by the creation of Teen Talk Barbie:

This doll was significant in that each doll said  4 phrases out of a list of 270, meaning that few dolls said the same 4 phrases.  However, the things they had Barbie saying were, generally, pretty fucking sexist. The phrase that got the most media attention, though was, “Math class is tough!”. The company ultimately pulled the phrase from the list, but continued to sell the doll.

Anyway, in my research for these various Barbie projects I’ve undertaken, I’ve watched a lot of Barbie ads, and I thought it would be fun to compile all of my favorites in one central location.

Loving You Barbie (1983) 

I love this ad because it is so strangely queer. The little girls are writing notes telling Barbie how much they love her and they continually state how beautiful she is. Generally Barbie ads cultivate this sort of hero-worship feeling about the doll, but this one just feels romantic.

Color Splash Pocahontas (1995) 

Um. Why does John Smith have a color-changing chest Eagle?

Cool Shavin’ Ken (1996) 

I mean, I know it’s Barbie, but this one is so heteronormative that it kind of grosses me out, and I’m currently in a very hetero relationship. Also, I love the Old Spice tie in.

Astronaut Barbie (1985) 

This one is by far my favorite. Barbie doesn’t even pretend she’s getting anything productive done in space. She even TAKES HER HELMET OFF to dance under a space disco ball. I also love the puffy sleeves on that space suit.

Sabrina the Teenage Witch – The 1970s Cartoon

If you, like me, grew up in the 1990s and swore you saw an animated Sabrina show (that wasn’t the 2000s animated show) late at night on Cartoon Network, YOU WEREN’T DREAMING. It exists!

This iteration of the show definitely has the look of the original Archie comics series. Sabrina’s aunts aren’t nearly as pretty or likable, it’s impossibly sexist, and Harvey is actually somehow dumber than he was in the 90s show.

Also, it’s worse than you remembered. And the theme song is infectious, so watch out.

 

I have to say, I like the short hair look way better on Sabrina.

 

That Time Sabrina The Teenage Witch met The Violent Femmes

A couple months ago, I made my boyfriend watch this strange little piece of TV history: When Sabrina the Teenage Witch met the members of Violent Femmes–the band most famous for this song.

However, Violent Femmes did a lot of really great music, and if you haven’t listened to their other work, you really should.

Anyway, despite my own teenage enjoyment of the band, I don’t know that they were ever the stud-muffins that they are made out to be in this episode. I’m including a clip below, but it’s worth a laugh to watch the whole episode on Amazon Prime if you have the time and the resources to do so.

 

P.S. I also just found this clip of the femmes performing The Spongebob Squarepants theme song from 2002–it was included on the 1st Season Spongebob DVD